DISCLAIMER: Don't own them or have any association with the owners or affiliates.

Ratings: G

NOTES: This is mainly an Ezra story. I was inspired by a song by the same name. This is probably the most descriptive one I have ever done.

CRUSH
by Gina

"Oh, no! Where's my journal?" Catherine said as she came inside her room. She started to look frantically for it for she thought that she had left it on her desk. She remembered she was carrying it when she went out but, where did she leave it. Her eyes were wild at the thought of someone touching it or reading it. Okay, okay control yourself Catherine told herself. All I have to do is retrace the places I went. So, Catherine picked up her bag, put on her scarf and started on her way.

Catherine walked by the Clarion and went inside to see if Mary was there. Mary was inside and she greeted her jovial and looked around to see if her book was anywhere. She didn't see it and Mary asked her if she needed anything since she looked worried. Catherine told her that she was alright and asked her if she had seen her book but, Mary said that she hadn't seen any such book.

Meanwhile at the saloon, Vin Tanner was sitting at the regular table drinking and watching the streets. Vin turned his head and noticed that a book was left by the chair next to him. He looked around to see if it belonged to anyone but, it didn't look like anyone's in the bar. He picked it up and notice the good condition and the neat hand writing inside it. It didn't have a name. Vin perused the book and felt that it belonged to a woman. He started to read some of it.

"She had eyed that man from afar and yet, did not have the courage to approach him. He was too much of an enigma as the last man she had lent her heart to. How could she know this? How could she see what a wonderful man he truly is? She did not have to reason this she knew. It was more than just a sight or a habitual act that came as swiftly as the wind or as close as the sun. It was a waterfall of emotions and glows that changed her in ways that she did not understand. Maybe she was not supposed to understand. The cards still hadn't been dealt yet."

Chris Larabee's voice suddenly broke through from Vin's intent concentration.

"Vin. How long does it take you to answer?" Chris was standing at the doorway of the saloon and not very pleased with Mr. Tanner's response.

"Sorry Chris. What's the problem?"

"Judge Travis is bringing some prisoners to town."

"Alright. Lead the way." Vin tells Chris and leaves the book on table and departs.

Catherine had been looking for her book for hours and still had no luck. She was walking to the General Store when she dropped her scarf.

"Miss you dropped this." Buck Wilmington called out to her as she was walking past.

"Oh, thank you." Catherine said to him very courteously. She noticed that JD and the rest of the peacekeepers were outside waiting for something. Her eyes lingered over to where Ezra was standing and she was distracted by the sight of him. Buck Wilmington came right in front of her and said charmingly.

"I don't believe I've seen you around here before."

"Perhaps you weren't looking hard enough." A sly smile comes upon her face as she nonchalantly moves away. She can hear and imagine the surprised looks on their faces from the little remark she gave Buck. Catherine felt her face light up at the thought of Ezra Standish smiling.

Catherine sat down on a bench and closed her eyes. What a day! I can't believe I lost it. She opened her eyes when she felt someone sit next to her. She could hardly believe her eyes. It was Ezra. He instantly pulled out his flask.

"Woo. That certainly was the most uncivilized bunch I have ever had the liberty to escort." Ezra says. Catherine looks and Nathan is at the steps. Nathan replies.

"It amazes me that they even lasted this long."

Ezra starts to open his flask and notices that Catherine is looking at him. He flashes his gold tooth at her and offers some of his flask. Catherine is a little star-struck but, remains calm.

"Someone of your stature should not drink." she tells him.

"How very benevolent of you to think that way, my lady." Ezra takes a drink from his flask. Catherine is embarrassed by his presence yet she cannot move. She is paralyzed by him that she cannot think of anything else or do anything even breathe. She realizes that she has been staring at him and remembers that she still has to find her book. God, I hope no one is reading it she thinks to herself.

"Whatcha reading kid?" Buck is forever nagging the kid and giving him advice never leaving him alone.

"Oh, nothing." JD tells him trying to hide the book behind his back..

"Well, then you won't mind me taking a peek at it." Buck says as he wrestles with the kid as they are walking.

"Hey, Buck!" JD yells at him once he has overtaken him.

"Oh, oh." Buck teasingly says. "What is this?" JD is still trying to get the book from him.

"She watched from her window the man stroll around town carefree and without thought. Where ever his flowing body carried him her intense eyes followed. Hehe. Where did you get this?"

"I found it Buck if you must know." JD is very angry and manages to get the book back.

"It sounds to me that someone has a crush." Buck tells him. "Who wrote it?" .

"I don't know. I'm trying to figure it out." JD tells Buck still very annoyed.

"I bet I know." Buck lightheartedly says.

"Yeah right, Buck I'll believe you. You probably think it's about you." JD declares.

"Of course. No woman can resist my magnetism."

"Buck get a life."

Catherine was in the church when Josiah came in. She looked up and smiled.

"May I help you Miss?" Josiah asked.

"I was just looking for something." Catherine tells the preacher. "I thought I left my book here."

"I didn't find any book here besides the book of the Lord." Josiah states to her.

"Thank you anyway." Catherine leaves the church.

"However far or near she waited and watched him float around town forever dreaming and fancying that he would float toward her. Yes, she passed by him but he would not think twice about turning his tantalizing eyes for his love grew more from instinct and materialistic dreams. Hers was the simple touch of his hand she would forever engrave in her mind, the sparkle of his smile with those sensual lips she could only close her eyes to feel."

Chris put down the book and poured out some whiskey into his glass. He re-examined his surroundings and looked at the book. His thoughts came back to his wife, Sarah, and son, Adam. She was so beautiful he thinks to himself. He pictures them in his head waving good-bye to him on that fateful day. He closes his eyes and takes another drink. He opens them again and sees Mary closing her shop. Mary. The strength she had was something he could not deny. He respected Mary and probably something more. He wasn't blind.

The moon was the only light shining and Catherine's steps began to carry herself with an added weight. She had spent the daylight searching for her journal hoping against hope that it would appear untouched and unviolated by prying eyes. She walked past the saloon and dared herself not to peek inside for she would only make herself feel more depressed and stupid.

"How could I let myself lose it?" she says furiously to herself. "I am above myself to think that anyone would not read it."

"Every word he speaks is an ethereeal world filled with wonder and disguise. His soul is the most magnificent and precious pearl hidden inside his oyster shell that a rare few can open up and expose."

Catherine came across Chris smoking and Vin keeping guard. She then passed the church and saw Josiah and Nathan inside. She felt herself become more saddened and hopeless. She hadn't been in town for more than a month and she didn't feel that she belonged. She wasn't well-known in town not that she was fond of that kind of hype anyway. She liked the serene life and she couldn't possibly ask for more. But she did want more. Catherine looked up at the night sky and said

"Oh, sweet night just give me what I am seeking."

"This spell he casts on her is unlike anyone else's like a soft spoken whisper caressing her and fulfilling her wildest dreams."

The doorknob of the hotel building felt cold as she turned it and went inside. She saw herself for the first time and what a mess she was. Well, that is what she thought when she saw herself in the mirror. H